Ms. White Guy
 Ms. White Guy stares at you | |
| Other name(s) | Ms. Callums[1] |
|---|---|
| Breed | Domestic Shorthair |
| Coat | Black with Very High White Spotting |
| Sex | Female (Confirmed) |
| Rarity | Common |
| Occupation | Asylum patient, part-time worker at a Walmart near you, member of the Bald Congress |
| Appearance | Balding |
| Eye Color | Brown |
| Personality | Paranoid, peculiar, insane |
| First known sighting | July 21, 2024 |
| Relations | |
| Parents | Unknown |
| Siblings | Unknown |
| Partner | None |
| Children | None |
| Other | Clone: Mama Goose |
Ms. White Guy is a regular visitor of the Kitty Corner feeder. She was named after the fact that she closely resembles your average balding Caucasian male.
Behavior
Ms. White Guy is arguably one of the most common visitors of the Kitty Corner feeder, showing up multiple times a day. She isn't seen with other cats much, but when she is she is unbothered by their presence. She does, however, have a habit of looking around, terrified, and jumping even when there is nothing there to scare her. She most often shows up during the tail end of the morning or early in the evening. Up until recently, Ms. White Guy was believed to be male.
Appearance
Ms. White Guy is a shorthair cat with a completely white coat. The only exception to this is her remarkable black patch on her head, which makes her look like she has a receding hairline. She has dark brown eyes, as was discovered when she decided to stare at the camera threateningly one time. Her nose, inner ears, and paws are light pink. She also happens to look exactly like Mama Goose. The easiest way to tell them apart is that Ms. White Guy's "hairline" is darker than Mama Goose's, and Mama Goose's face looks softer and kinder than Ms. White Guy's.
Sightings
July 2024
- July 21, 2024: At 9:21 AM, Ms. White Guy made her first appearance. She nibbled alone for a while before leaving a few minutes later.
- July 26, 2024: Ms. White Guy was spotted with Mr. Mandarin at 8:15 PM (LFT). She was quite chill and unbothered by the other cats presence. She ate at the feeder before making her exit.
- July 29, 2024: Ms. White Guy showed up to the feeder again at 8:54 PM (LFT). She ate before leaving just a few minutes later.
August 2024
- August 4, 2024: At 9:09 AM (LFT), Ms. White Guy popped into the feeder. She ate vigorously. She left around 9:15 PM.
- August 11, 2024: Ms. White Guy was once again spotted at the feeder at 12:50 AM (LFT). There wasn't much left in the feeder, but she munched anyways.
- August 25, 2024: At 8:58 PM (LFT), Ms. White Guy showed off her hairline at the Miwu feeder. She had a staring contest with the front camera before eating some more. She spent plenty of time at the feeder, only leaving around 9:20 PM.
September 2024
- September 1, 2024: At 10:09 AM (LFT), Ms. White Guy appeared at the feeder. She stared at the camera, pleading for food. When food was dropped, she ate vigorously. Ms. White Guy left at 10:14 AM.
- September 2, 2024:
- At 9:25 AM (LFT), Ms. White Guy popped up at the feeder to eat. She seemed quite distracted by something to her left, looking in that direction multiple times. Suddenly, without warning, Ms. White Guy sprung up and jumped backwards from the feeder, even though nothing was there. After standing there bewildered, she returned to eating.
- At 7:06 PM (LFT), Ms. White Guy was spotted with a tortoiseshell cat, Mr. Hopper, Mr. Judgement, and Mr. Mandarin. She poked her little, balding head out from behind the feeder, and booped noses with the tortoiseshell. With such a full feeder, Ms. White Guy wasn't able to get any kibble. She did, however drink some water. After a few minutes, Ms. White Guy showed her face again and jumped on top of the feeder. At 7:20 PM, Mr. White Guy was finally able to eat.
- September 3, 2024: At 8:46 (LFT), Ms. White Guy appeared at the feeder. She ate ravenously before leaving at 8:49.
- September 8, 2024: Around 4:50 AM (LFT), Ms. White Guy and Brother Sniffles were involved in a hold up at Miwu feeder, chasing Mr. Mandarin, who was attempting to eat. Once he had left, Brother Sniffles smacked Ms. White Guy and she jumped on top of the feeder. Once Brother Sniffles left (without even eating, mind you), Ms. White Guy jumped down and ate at the feeder for a few moments, looking around, paranoid as usual. She left at 4:52 AM (LFT).
October 2024
- October 5, 2024: At 2:26 AM (LFT), Ms. White Guy appeared at the feeder along with Mr. Hopper and another smaller orange cat. She ate at the feeder by herself for a few minutes before leaving. She came back just a minute later, took a bite, and then left again at 2:30 AM (LFT)
(Not every cat sighting is documented.)
(LFT = "Local Feeder Time")
References
- Callums Corner. “MY HEAD DOES NOT LOOK like a SODDING TIC TAC. A FINAL WARNING.” YouTube, 20 July 2016, www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJd2bHwVnLE. Accessed 3 Oct. 2024.
Gallery
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Ms. White Guy showing off her hairline
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Blehhh!
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Shook, perturbed even
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Ms. White Guy gets startled (GIF)
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Ms. White Guy breaks the laws of physics (GIF)
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Ms. White guy fails at eating (GIF)
